Mention you see a couple of roaches and the exterminator will be there within 24 hours. Thank God.
It's best to say 'yes' when male coworkers ask you if you have a boyfriend.
My coworker has "abnormal periods"and has to fill a $75 prescription. The new guy learned this as well. As did the wine rep. And three guys at the bar. And the bartender.
I work with a man who looks and sounds just like Dave Chappelle. And a woman who looks and sounds just like Wanda Sykes. It would be rude to tell them this, I fear. But they may start to wonder why I think everything they say is HILARIOUS.
My daughter is the friendliest child I've ever met. Somehow she learned how to share.
My daughter is the squirreliest child I've ever met. Somehow she learned how to get out of the belt of her high chair. She also figured out how to stand up out from under the tray. She also learned that when she turns around to face the back of the chair and hangs one leg over the side her mother screams.
Ohio, in fact, does NOT charge tax on their groceries like someone told me a while ago. I would like to apologize to Ohio on behalf of myself and the profanities I may or may not have uttered under my breath.
If I have cookies in the house, I will eat them all in under 24 hours.
Things I Will Learn Tomorrow...if Smartfood popcorn will ruin me and the baby.
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When I was a baby I knew how to get out of the carseat without undoing any of the straps. I would get out and lay on the floor in the backseat. My mother didn't think this was very funny.
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