Oh...It's You.

Well, I did it. I had organic half and half in my coffee this morning. And was in the bathroom in under 7 minutes. Tonight, I had dinner with a dear dear friend who I don't see as often as I would like. We split two appetizers: chicken tenders, I had barbeque sauce, she had ranch dressing; and loaded potato skins with sour cream. Let me just tell you about my love of the loaded potato. Many years ago, before I knew what was what, I would always order a house salad and loaded baked potato whenever I went out to eat. It was perfect for me. The salad was crunchy and had lovely little croutons on it. The potato had crispy bacon and cheese and onions; right there, four of my favorite food items. (My mom said I could eat an onion like an apple when I was a kid.) Salad was cold. Potato was hot. It went perfectly with my Kahlua and cream. I'll hold while you finish laughing.

Anyhoo, it never failed. I couldn't leave a restaurant without having to go to the bathroom. Whenever I would go out to eat with my parents, my dad would say, "You want to check out the bathroom now or later?" while we were waiting to be seated. It was awful. My whole life has been one restaurant bathroom after another. Road trips? Frequent stops. Camping? Forget it. I know where all the good bathrooms are here and in NYC. I've had many an embarrassing moment in my life. My honeymoon to name one, though I'll spare you the details. It's...horrifying. I've only told four people and I bet they wish I hadn't.

So when I look back over my life, dairy has been a real killer. I always thought it was just part of being me. But since I cut out dairy back in October, I haven't had any embarrassing moments, except for a close call when I'd eaten something that had dairy in it and I didn't realize it. People have been telling me for months to eat it so she'll get used to it. Every time I had it before she would get sick. She'd break out in a rash all over her body that looked like she'd been burned with cigarettes, and she would scream all night long. If I ate something that was prepared on equipment shared with milk or peanuts she would have a reaction.

Well, it's been three hours since I had the potato skins. They stayed in me for all of 20 minutes and now baby has a horrible phelgmy thing going on in the back of her throat and it's making her cough. I'm not sure if it's related to the half and half and cheese and sour cream or if it is just a coincidence.

I'm going to have to say, I felt the same way today that I always felt after eating dairy, even though nothing makes me happier than a glass of super cold milk poured over ice. I think that I'm just going to have to skip the cheese and ice cream and all things I love so much. I will use half and half in my coffee for a while. See if that doesn't start to agree with me. I do miss Fage yogurt with pineapple and honey. Maybe I'll try that out again.

So, I'll update you on the baby's skin condition tomorrow or the next day. Hopefully she's okay. The guilt is making me feel all Catholic.