Saturday, August 15

Nothing Gets Past Her

The baby had her first bank sucker today. They have always asked me if she could have a "you know" and I've always said no. Today, the woman didn't even ask me. Baby girl was crying her little eyes out and had been for about twenty minutes. It doesn't help that the bank is behind Gramma's house, so she knew we were close and far away.

So, I opened the container and inside was a little sucker. So I gave it to her. She looked at it...put it in her mouth...and said, "Mmmm." It was lovely. And she ate it like she'd had a million suckers.

Went out with Gramma to the mall. I never go to the mall, but I had a coupon for JCPenney and thought I could use it. And to think...I used to browse Barney's. Anyhoo...when we were walking out of the store she was overstimulated by all the lights and signs in the inner-area of the mall. She immediately caught site of the fountain. "Mama! Splash splash!"

Baby fell asleep whilst perusing the President flashcards on my iTouch. She was woken by a woman who was pointing her out to her own baby girl. The first thing she said upon waking was "Go see splash splash."

An hour or so later, we stopped by Target. In the aisle where Post-its and tape are found, baby kept saying something like "sies kid...sies kid." Gramma said, "I don't know what she is saying." She took baby closer to the shelf and she pointed to a magnifying glass. I said, "Oh my gosh. Sid the Science Kid." This kid doesn't miss a beat.

Friday, August 14

Two Years

It's hard to believe, but two years ago today I held you in my arms for the first time. I never knew I could love someone so much. You were such a beautiful baby. Perfect. As you grew, I couldn't take you anywhere. Strangers were always coming up to me to comment on your flawless skin or your gorgeous eyes or your exquisite mouth. And people are still saying those things about you. Only,'re not in a carrier strapped to my body. You're begging to walk and "do it" by yourself through the store aisles or down the street. You're growing up so fast.

I had pictured you running through Central Park and wrecking the MOMA, but you seem to be enjoying walking Gramma's dog and running in the small front yard outside our door. I love that you love being outside. You get that from your grandmother, I like to think. Lately, you've developed a distaste for bugs. Not quite sure how that happened, but it's my goal to make you love them. And as my gift to you, I will try my hardest to learn to like birds as much as you like rocks and Sweet Gum fruits.

You've developed a love of Sesame Street, cell phones, string cheese, books, babies and dolls and plums. You also have some sort of innate ability to take to any musical instrument that is put in front of you. You got a harmonica for your birthday and somehow you knew how to play it without my having to show you. You have a little piano at Gramma's house that you love to play, moving one finger at a time. You know all the words to "Do-Re-Mi" and you know where "birdies go nigh-nigh" and how to put on lotion and that some things can be "frustrating." You love bacon and coloring. You love sockit-sips (chocolate chips), sippy sips (sippy cup) and chippy chips (white corn tortilla chips). You love to drink all of my jo-jo (orange juice) and eat all of my salmon.

You like to close the door and play 'knock knock' and you even know to walk into the room and say, "Nice to see you" as you shake my hand. You say, "Bless you, mama" when I sneeze and give the best Huddy hugs. You always tell me you love me, and it is music to my ears.

You have the most vivid imagination. And the greatest sense of humor. You don't put your fingers in your mouth immediately whenever you're having your picture taken. You, instead, say "Cheeseburger" and make the clicking of the camera noise with your tongue afterward. Adorable.

You have developed an intense love for musicals. For quite some time you were hooked on The Sound of Music. Then it was Mary Poppins. Then Annie. Then Enchanted. And now it's a toss up between Follow That Bird and Singin' in the Rain. I am very proud of that last one, as your dear old mother had a serious crush on Gene Kelly in her younger years.

Everyday I spend with you is another day when I learn something new about myself. I am learning more about how to let go and let you discover the world as you teach me what it means to be your mom.

I am so proud of you. And I am so grateful everyday that you are healthy and happy and strong. I am so looking forward to your next milestones in the coming year. It saddens me to think that one day soon you may not want to snuggle with me for as long as I want you to, and one day you might even be embarrassed to be seen with me. At least I know that all of these days and these past two years, I have been your biggest cheerleader and your number one fan.

You are my hero you brave, brilliant, generous soul. Happy Birthday!

Saturday, August 8

Another Reason to Move Back

Vacation was pure delight. Got to spend the night in Chicago. We took the train in from Michigan. It was quite nice. I miss taking the train everywhere. I cannot stand having to have a car. Cannot. Stand. Seventy-two dollars a month for an unlimited pass is still way better than gas, insurance, car payment (not that I have one) and maintenance. And speeding tickets. Boo. Yes, I passed a cop who pretty much set-me-up. He was driving slowly in the right lane. So I got over. He got over quickly into the passing lane and then swerved back over into the right lane. I passed him because I didn't know what he was doing. Unmarked Mustang. I got over in front of him and he got me. Oh well. Nothing I can do about it now. Except dream my life away that I live in a city with a subway system that can take me anywhere I want to go within minutes and leave the entrapment to someone else.

Sunday, August 2

From See to Shining C

So, I got a C in my math class. Ugh. I except it. I am thrilled I don't have to retake the class. I wish I could have gotten an A. I know that people shared notes from previous semesters, and some students had graphing calculators (duh!), and I did catch the girl next to me cheating off my final. She saw my answer for a question about a shape that has five rotations. She looked at my paper, turned straight to that page and erased everything she had written and copied my answer. I'm sure it wasn't verbatim what I had written, but I was pissed. I worked my ass off in that class. I deserved every point I could get on my own and she took some of those points away from me. Whatever.

I also haven't had a panic attack since the day of my math final. Go figure.

I'm off for a week's vacation with the two loves of my life: my brilliant child and my wonderful boyfriend, both of whom have had to put up with my being a total psychopath off-and-on these past seven months. I'm so grateful. (I hope he knows that.)

I can see graduation even though it is illuminating next December. I'm looking forward to the adventure that follows and the rest of my life.

I am the luckiest girl in the world. I hope my daughter is proud of her mother.