Oh My CRAP!

Pardon me while I try to pull myself out from underneath a pile of books. Good Lord.

First of all, let me start by saying, if you're going to admit 10,000 more students you're going to need more than two ways into the parking lots.

My biology teacher is a mess. We're her first class. Ev. Er. She should not be teaching. She did research for years at a cancer hospital. I think she actually called it Cancer Hospital. Hmm. Not sure about that one. Well, she can do. She shouldn't be teaching. (Ooh...that is mean. Especially since I'm going to be a teacher...but it's true. At least in this case.) The first day of class she had us go around and tell her why we were taking the class. One girl said, "I'm a psychology major and a neuroblahblahblah minor and I'm taking this because I'm premed and I'm fulfilling my medical requirements." Verbatim. After class we had lab and the same girl, whose name I would love to post because it's so outrageous, said, "This class is too simple. I could graduate now and I've only been here two years. At least this class will raise my grade point average." It made me irrationally happy today when the girl told the teacher she had no clue what she was talking about.

Today was the worst! We sat down and the teacher put some overhead sheets on the board. She said, "Okay. Chapter 2." We all looked around at each other like she was crazy. Someone said, "Did you do Chapter 1?" She said, "Well, I touched on the high points." Uh...what? I'm pretty sure all we did was go over the syllabus. There was a boy in the back who kept asking questions, and by "in the back" I mean in the fourth row because on the first day the teacher asked "Can you all move up to the first three or four rows so I don't have to project my voice?" Uh...lady? Projecting your voice is like Teacher Move #3 in the How to Be a Good Teacher Manual. The first day she looked like Laura Ingalls. Today she looked like Debbie Does Dallas.

Anyhoo, the boy asked her a question about something she had on the overhead:
Isotopes of hydrogen
Tritium is an important radioisotope of hydrogen often used in scientific experiements.

Boy: What kind of scientific experiments?
Teacher: I don't know.
Rest of the class: *crickets*

Finally, at the end of class, the same boy said, "It's like you're speaking French. I don't know what you're talking about." She said, "I can talk to you after class." Okay. We'll all just stay. She said, "Did you read the chapter?" He said, "No. I don't have a book yet, they're still out at the bookstore." She said, "Just be sure to read the chapters." So finally I said, "So, we're supposed to read the chapter and then come here so you can just read it back to us?" I felt bad about it, but COME ON! I don't have time to teach myself this class. I have a gazillion other things to worry about and I paid her salary. She needs to do it. Oh yeah. And she didn't find out she was hired until the day before school started.

The only highlight is there's a girl in the class named Immerse. Or something.