Wednesday, August 13

I Am a Genius. Give Me My Millions.

Only brilliant things come from my person.

With each passing day I get more pissed that my work lets clients just wander in any time they feel like it. Have an appointment at 10 a.m.? Show up instead at 11.15 a.m.? No problem! We'll rearrange everyone's schedule so you can get all of your services. It's fine. These people are prisoners, see? It's okay.

Well, I think that if you show up 25 minutes late for your 50 minutes massage then you should have to pay full-price, but you can only get a thirty minute massage. If you decide when you arrive that you'd rather not have a massage and would instead like a haircut, then you still need to pay for said massage. You cancel altogether in under 24 hours you pay full price and don't get the massage at all. No, you cannot come on another day claiming you've prepaid. This all may sound harsh, and I even think it is a bit much, but when you're trying to feed a tiny person and you're expecting to make a certain amount of money everyday and then you get a phone call that everyone has canceled at the last minute...I get rawther upset.

Where I used to work, they did implement the above rules. I complained. I hated telling people they had to pay for their sister's pedicure even though she couldn't possibly have known she was going to be in labor and wouldn't be able to make it in for her service. Actually, they may have made an exception in that case, with a doctor's note and live feed from the delivery room.

So, here is my brilliant plan. How many haircuts does someone get a year? Five? Six? Someone normal. Not someone like me who just today got their first haircut since October. Have clients pay ahead of time. You get a ten percent discount on each haircut and then if you don't show up, half is deducted from your package. It's like a gym membership. One that you will actually show up for. Think of how many people have prepaid for a gym membership each month and end up only going once or twice. That way, I get paid and you learn your lesson.

I'm feeling all Sopranos and shit.

1 comment:

House of Jules said...

Hey Jenni, you just left a comment on my blog about MP... and I'd like to volunteer along with you on the water droplet tasting committee!

By the way, the name of your blog made me about DIE laughing. BABY FISH MOUTH! One of the best lines in one of my fave movies ever.
House of Jules