I'm Rodney Dangerfield

Yes. That's right, kids. I'm going back to school. August 25, first day of class. I'm going to get another bachelor's in elementary education. I come from a family of teachers and hairdressers, so it only seems right. My long-term goal is to get my master's in library science and be an elementary school librarian. I remember my elementary school librarians. I went to two different schools. I loved them both. The first school didn't have any walls between classrooms. Book shelves made half-walls, which is probably where my obsession with books came from. The second school had a tiny little library. The librarian's name was Amanda Sue Shelton. She was probably in her 40s or early 50s at the time. I remember she had a monogrammed sweater with sAs on it. I knew her name was Amanda Sue from the yearbooks. I asked her why it was like that on her sweater, because I myself was a good Southern girl and had one of my very own; wore it in my 2nd grade photo. She tried very hard to explain it to me that having it the correct way aSs would not work. I think I would've just skipped the sweater and accepted it was something I could never have...like height or perfect skin. Or capped sleeves. I wish I would've written down the book I used to check out. I was the only person to ever read it. I never returned it, I just checked it out again and again. It may have been the Bobbsey Twins, but I just can't remember. I'll have to check it out at my local library, which by the way I'm totally addicted to right now.

I went the other day to return a book. Huddy slept for a record 2.5 hours and the library closes at 5 p.m. on Sunday. It's only a block away so I ran over there (and was flashed by a young man..disgusting...trying to block out that image....) and the girl said they were closing in five minutes. I ran to the new arrivals and a cop came over and said, "We're closing up so it's time to go." I wanted to say, "Dude. Five seconds ago I had five minutes. Get off my back and stop breathing donut breath and coffee on my child." But I didn't. I left.

So anyway...the point of my story is...I cannot WAIT to quit my job and work at Starbuck's. The end.