This semester is a bust.
I was off school last week from Monday to Thursday. My practicum therefore was canceled on Monday and Wednesday, as well. Only, I didn't realize that the county had called off school. I was up at 6.20 a.m. on Monday for some reason...can't remember why.... The only schools that were called off were an hour and a half away. They still get our local news and Lexington's news. So I figured it was just bad weather to the west and south of us.
I suspected baby was teething. She had a temperature of 100.4. Oh yeah! That's why I was awake at 6.20 a.m. Duh. Anyway, I didn't want to take her to daycare, so I called my mother and asked her if she would come down and watch her. It was about time for her nap and I didn't particularly want to take her outside if it wasn't necessary.
I drove out to my practicum with no problem whatsoever. I pull into the parking lot...empty. WTH? I didn't see anything on the news about it. It had snowed a tiny bit and was pretty cold but it wasn't unbearable. There wasn't even any snow on the roads. I still don't know if they'd been let go early or if school had been called off altogether.
I ended up using the few minutes of pretend free time I had and stopped by a consignment shop. I found some really great jeans; two pair of Gap and one pair of Banana Republic all for under $3.99. They were marked 50% off. I can't figure out why they were still there. I also found the greatest sweater ever invented: cable-knit cream sweater with a hood, no buttons, and a belt. Also in the 50% off room. There were only two other things on the rack with it, so it wasn't like someone needed to search through a hundred sweaters to find it. It was just there begging to be purchased. I bought it for $3.50. Crazy.
When I went to pay my card was rejected three times. Card error. I left my stuff there and went home. My lovely mother was headed out to the grocery which is right next door to the store and picked up my clothes for me. She's so wonderful. I can't wait to do things like that for baby. I love getting little gifts for my mom. Things she wants that she would never buy for herself, like Chanel No. 5 Body Creme, which has replaced Chanel No. 5 Body Lotion. (If you remember...everything I like is eventually canceled or discontinued. I do not lie about these things.)
I went home and checked my balance through the bank's website. Plenty of money. One of my resolutions is to only write checks for things. Hope you don't end up in line behind me. My mother writes checks everywhere she goes. Remember the fit she threw at Gap Outlet? She threw the same fit at IKEA. I think it is very important and a great way to keep track of expenses. I just suck at it.
Friday, I went with The Boy to a store downtown to buy us stainless steel water bottles. Card error wasn't the message this time, but something more elitist. Finally I had the sense to call my bank.
Baby Fish Mouth: Something is wrong with my debit card.
Teller: Account number?
BFM: *waiting*
Teller: Oh, this card has been canceled.
BFM: Uh...nuh uh.
Teller: Yes, it has.
BFM: By whom?
Teller: Well, the company who owns your card had a security breach so your card was canceled.
BFM: How was I supposed to know this?
Teller: Well, it was on the news last week. Don't you watch the news?
BFM: No. I don't. I quit watching the news when I saw a bank teller had been strangled through the phone. (I didn't really say that, but I wanted to say it.)
I'm sorry. Do I have to rely on the local news to tell me important information from my bank? They can't even freaking tell me when the schools are closed.
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1 comment:
The last two paragraphs were perfect. Now that's comedic writing. I had an out burst and no one makes me laugh my own laugh, NO ONE.
T
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